"He's Got the Whole World in His Hands"

Long post here.

Kind of a writing challenge like our friend Younce did a while back.

"How the Camel got his Hump" "How the Salt Pillars came to be around the Dead Sea" Many of the Greek stories of the Constellations. These are Etiological Myths. They explain the why and how and when of cultural taboos, and biological differences practiced and noticed by people all over the globe. I have called these sort of stories Anansi Stories since I was a young child. Others call them Just So Stories after the tales written down by Kipling. Many people call them origin stories, there is a Wikipedia entry calling them Pourquoi stories (French for why).

When I was young, we went to the library all the time. Over the summer, there were always contests for reading books and going to events at the various branches around town. There was a library hidden behind a strip mall in Burke. One day we went there, and a woman told stories. She was tall and dark, and had colorful clothes that wrapped all around her. She had a rain stick (the first I had ever seen) and told her stories with shadow puppets and marionettes and sound effects. Monkey and Lion and Giraffe and everyone else made appearances, but the best stories were all about Anansi.

So as you can see, my fascination with Tricksters started young.

More than a month ago now, I read Things Fall Apart. There was a story about how Turtle broke his shell. I will try to paraphrase from memory here. As Turtle is walking one morning, he overhears the birds talking about going to a feast in the sky. Turtle asks the birds to take him, and convinces them that he will be necessary, because the birds don't know all of the cultural nuances of the people in the sky. on the way up, he convinces the birds of two things, first, he should do all of the talking, and second that they should all take new names to honor the people of the sky. He chooses the name "All of You". They arrive at the feast, and the people of the sky tell the gathered birds that the feast is for "All of You" Turtle eats all of the food and the birds get angry. So they leave him up the sky. Turtle begs for help, and finally one of the birds listens and promises to tell everyone to gather all the soft things and put them in a pile so that Turtle can jump and land on them. But the Bird lies, and tells everyone to put all the sharp hard thing sin a pile. Turtle sees the pile and jumps and breaks his shell.

Here are a few links to full stories so that you get a sense of the writing style.

And here is the challenge. Write your own. I tried to write "How Sponge got his Pants" but I couldn't make it work. I also tried to write one set in the modern world, but ran up against mind blocks. So here is my Anansi Story.

"How Hedgehog Lost it All"

Now this was a long time ago. Before your Father was born, and before his Father, and before his. In the way back it was, so let us begin there.

Hedgehog was a mighty creature, and proud; lord of all the animals in the land. He was as big as Elk, as fast as Rabbit, and had sharp quills, like his cousin Porcupine, but his were of a poison so deadly that one touch could knock you down, two touches could put you to sleep, and a third would kill you. No one was a match for Hedgehog, and he was quite a rude king.

“Pelican” he would say “bring me food from across the sea”, and she would, though it would make her so tired she could not hunt for her own young so she gave them of her own blood.
He was thoughtless as well, “Tarantula” he would shout, “make me another coat today” and so Tarantula did wear out her spinners. Hedgehog was cruel to all of his subjects. He yelled at Dog every time he would fall asleep, just to see him turn round and round. He was also quite pompous, “Griffin” he commanded, “Fetch me the moon”. So Griffin flew away from this place to do as he was told.

No one could tell Hedgehog what to do, or how to rule, for if anyone questioned his rule, he would challenge them to a fight, or to a race; both of which he was sure to win. Elephant was larger, but the spines on Hedgehog would kill her. Cheetah was faster, but Hedgehog had longer legs and was almost as fast, and so would cross the finish line first. Every living thing in the land was depressed.

Into our story comes the Wild Boy. Friend to those that fly, and in fact, part bird himself; he was very angry at Hedgehog for working Pelican so hard she had to feed her children on her own blood. He challenged Hedgehog to a race. Hedgehog was faster, but the Boy was smart and challenged Hedgehog to race from Sundown till Sunup. Hedgehog agreed and so the race was to begin that night. The Wild Boy told Hedgehog that they should race to the edge of the world and back again and the first to get back to the starting line would be the winner. As the sun set, Hedgehog took off, and his long legs soon left the flying boy behind. But the Wild Boy had a plan. After an hour of racing, he turned back to the starting line. He knew Hedgehog could not see in the dark as well as he could, so he hid near the finish line. As the sun began to rise on the end of the race and all the other Animals gathered around, the Boy burst from his hiding place and flew to the finish line proclaiming that he was the winner. Hedgehog was angry, but he could not prove that the Wild Boy had cheated, so he asked the Boy what he wanted. He planned on taking it back later as soon as he could. “I’ll take your speed and be done with that” said the Wild Boy and with that he took off with Hedgehog’s speed and so was never caught again. This was not enough to bring down the arrogant King, who continued to rule with terrible fury, even worse than before.

Later, after the Flying Boy had taken his speed, the Hedgehog was blustering through the woods blaring at everything that he past. “Get me that, bring me this” he did bellow. It was then that he blundered into the glen of the oldest thing in the land. It was older than speech itself, though kept itself young by supping on the milk of maidens, and feasting on the fear of lost souls. When it heard the Hedgehog enter he challenged him:

“Who comes to these woods and makes such a fuss

who stamps like a pachyderm and quacks like a duck

you do disturb the balance with your constant need to cuss

and you do not want to mess with the one they call..”

“Who dares!” interrupted the Hedgehog, “challenge me in my woods?”

“Your woods?” said the spirit “and who are you?”

“I am the strongest fastest most powerful in the land, I am the king, I am Hedgehog” said Hedgehog, quite forgetting that the Wild Boy had taken his speed.

“Well then” said the spirit “a King indeed. You must forgive these old eyes; I did not recognize a King when I saw one”

“Well come out then from your hole and look your king in the face” said Hedgehog, as pompous as ever.

“But I am not in my hole”, said the spirit “I am in front of you”. And it was true, and his voice did come from the ground in front of Hedgehog. “But I am also behind you”, and this was also true, as Hedgehog spun to find the source of the voice coming from the trees behind him. “I am all around you little king, though soon a king no more I bet my supper, Ho Ho Ho”.

Hedgehog spun around and around, trying to locate the source of the laughter, echoing around him, frightening him, even through his spines. Eventually he became so afraid he collapsed, exhausted in the middle of the glen.

The little spirit, who was older than all the land walked up to the passed out Hedgehog and drank deeply of his fear, and for good measure, took his size, and gave it to Tarantula and Dog, and all the other little Animals, that they might all be a little larger.

When Hedgehog awoke, he was as small as a rabbit, and still as slow as could be, but he still had his pride, and his quills. He still demanded things of all the animals, and if they denied him, he would stick them with his spine, and they would get very sick, or die.

Into our world came the One from Tomorrow and Yesterday Together. The Imp had traveled to our world from his own to visit his friends. He visited Manticore and Hippogriff and Mermaid and then went to go look for his favorite. But Griffin was no where to be found. He asked all the other Animals and they told him what Hedgehog had done. Furious, the little imp pulled his hat down hard over his head, and ran through the forest, looking for the king.

When he got to the king he began to harangue him for what he had done to Griffin, and then he noticed how small he was. The imp began to laugh. Hedgehog was still very proud and began to attack the Imp, but even though Hedgehog’s poison was strong, he could not harm the Immortal one, and so he kept attacking until he had used up his very last spine. Then the Imp reached down and curled Hedgehog up into a little ball, and cursed him to have soft spines with no poison forever. He went back to looking for Griffin, as the other animals closed in on Hedgehog.

To this day Hedgehog is small and cowardly and curls into a ball when frightened. The Wild Boy, the Knavish Sprite, and the Imp still walk these parts. Now Tarantula grew some little spinners, and Pelican does not have to feed her children on her blood anymore. But to this day, Griffin still has not come home.

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So there you have it. Have a good time. Write a short one, write a long one. Just have fun.